Phone Call...

So tonight I received the phone call that I knew would be coming at some point, but really really was hoping I wouldn't..

Tonight I picked up the phone from an unfamiliar number and it was my son...

He's so homesick it broke my heart...

He said he wants to come home, he said he feels he cant do this...

As much as I wanted to jump in my car and go get him and bring him home and just love on him, I told him he could do this...  I told him how proud I was and that this is going to be the best decision he could make in his life...  There is nothing for him here except low paying factory jobs and fast food.   He tried the college life and it just wasn't something he could handle, for him it was all about the partying and girls.

How do I help him when I can't even write him yet, we don't get a physical address for him until hes halfway through bootcamp?

Hearing his voice tonight and hearing him cry broke my heart...  and I know it will get better in time, but hes only in reception, he doesnt even start bootcamp for another week...  :(

First night of no communication....

and I'm a little sad...

I know, I'm extremely lucky, hes been gone six days, and I have gotten to hear from him every night while he has been at reception, and I know many others haven't heard from their soldiers except a quick 2-3 minutes letting them know they arrived safely... He called me last night to let me know that some of the guys in his group were just horse playing around and it went to far, so the group was told to call their families and tell them they have lost phone privileges now until they earn them back in boot camp... could be a few weeks... So in that short call, I packed all the I love yous, prayers and I'm proud of yous that I could get in...

But today is the first day in the 19 and 1/2 years of his life that I have not gotten a phone call or a text just saying hi mom, or I love you...

Nothing...  I guess I need to change my thinking to No news is good news....

But right now, Im going to just lay here and email my MOMs prayer group ladies back and try to relax and think positive and happy thoughts for my soldier!  This is the first of many nights I wont hear from him, but I know hes safe!

Phone Calls....

So far I have been getting to talk to Zach daily while he was in reception before bootcamp, he usually calls around 845pm or so.  I was getting broke into him being gone slowly, and we knew the time would come when there would be no more phone calls, but last night while we were at a wedding, I got the call I didn't want to hear for a few more days..

"Mom, I love you, this is probably the last call for a few weeks.  Some of the guys got in a fight in the barracks, so we are losing cell phone privilages in about two minutes...."

So after some last minute, rushed I love yous and hugs and kisses... I got to tell him that no matter what he thought, that my heart was with him and he was always in my thoughts and I loved him more than he knew.   and with that he said...  Mom its time, they are collecting phones, I love you ....  

then he pulled the bandaid off quick and hung up....

I could hear the tears in his voice, but I know it will now he will be ok....

Sharing some pictures.. :)

So this is his locker, I really thought it would be a little neater, but for Zach this is a 100000% improvement over what he had his stuff like here  :)  lol   

WOW, I thought his hair was short before, love the army look!

WOW, my own soldier, looking so handsome!

Mom's Prayer for her Son

I Give To You, My Son-
I held him as an infant; I hugged him as a boy
and through the years he has become my greatest pride and joy.

I love him more than I can say, 
his life more precious than my own,
but gone are the whims and notions of the little boy that I had known.


For the years have passed so quickly since the time it all began
and now he stands before me with the conviction of a man.


He wants to serve his country, he states aloud with pride
as I try to sort out the emotions that I'm feeling deep inside...

a union of the uncertain fear, which I cannot control
and the allegiance which lies deep within my patriotic soul.


I trust that my years of guidance will serve as a strong foundation
as he performs the duties requested from his beloved nation.


God please guide him as he travels to the places our soldiers have bled
and walk with him through pathways where those heroes' feet have tread.


Oh Sweet Land of Liberty, humbly I give to you, my son
praying you'll return him safely home when his work for you is done.



---Author unknown---

Phone Calls

I feel so blessed that Zach has been able to call every night since he has been there.  While he is in reception we are able to talk to him...

Yet I am frustrated as all get out that he is so distracted with everything going on that in the five minutes he gets to talk to us he is distracted by everything and talks to everyone else in the room with him...   I want to grab his shoulders and yell at him "TALK TO ME AND IGNORE EVERYTHING ELSE"...   I am so hungry for every word he says.  

I find myself laying here all day just staring at the phone waiting for him to call and tell me everything he did.   I dont ever let my phone out of sight.   He says next Wednesday his bootcamp starts and he will be unable to talk then.   Oh Lord, I hope I am more adjusted by then, Im getting better, but still just would rather lay here and cry than go out and do anything else....

Wish there were some more moms in the area that I could talk with, only know one so far.   Hoping more come out of the woodwork soon.

Blah

Today I just laid in bed and cried, haven't showered, don't really care.   I have looked at all his scrapbooks and re-read all his papers, ect.  

He was able to call again tonight.   I had been afraid to leave or do anything all day for fear of missing his call, but tonight he called again.   He seemed so preoccupied, it was frustrating to try and talk and get him to tell me about his day, because he was talking to everyone and getting things done.  He said that he has his first overnight patrol tonight, he is kind of excited and also he said he got busted sleeping standing up in formation and the sgt just tapped him and laughed and said that was a first.

Tomorrow I have to make myself get out of bed...   I have to do something to get out of this funk...