I am new to blogging, and I am new to Army life. I have been searching for information on how I, as a mom, and supposed to best support my Son as he leaves for Boot Camp. I have spent much time looking for support groups and have found many that cater to Military Spouses and the Soldiers family with him, but am totally at a loss for what me as a Mom at home is able to do.
My son leaves in 5 days. My oldest son. My son that I have sheltered though life. I feel as if my heart is being ripped out of my chest. In the 19 1/2 years hes been on this earth I have spoke to him daily and on the very rare occasion that I haven't spoken to him, I have gotten a text, even a simple "ily" late at night. I find myself looking at him now and taking pictures of him like I am never going to see him again. While I am filled with Pride about this choice he made, my heart is breaking into a million pieces over him leaving.
I find myself crying and walking around like he is dying or doing something harmful. I have days where I am in bed just crying and thinking of all the things I should have done while I still was able to hold him close. I am doing my best to smile and not let him see this side of me. One of my biggest fears is he will see the pain I am in and then be thinking of that while he is gone.
Basic is going to be hell on him. Hes excited at what is to come. He has been working hard on his PT and has spent hours talking to people about what to expect so he can be prepared. I on the other hand have been trying to find out what my role is... I thought it was to write him, but most sites I do find say it will be 3+ weeks before they even have an address for me to write him... I even read that I won't be able to speak to him for weeks and then only 5 minutes.
Is anyone out there feeling as alone in this as I am? Anyone know of sites for us Military Moms that are not Military Spouses? What websites are legitimate ones that have legitimate information on them for us?
this made me cry! Cari, i know there will always be that part of you that wants to keep him locked away at home so he wont have to leave. but just remember like we talked about at the cook out... its his future and if he is willing, just help him through as much as you can! it going to take a toll on everyone, especially YOU!
ReplyDelete<3 ashlee